My two mothers

She stood in the middle of the field and looked at the trees swaying back and forth as the wind pushed them towards her, like a crowd surging forward in anger. The skies were menacing that day, with dark clouds threatening her presence. But she stood firm, both feet planted securely in the Earth from which she sprung out of. Despite the turmoil around her, she had a serene feeling of peace, of belonging and she knew she was safe. There was thunder rumbling from the distance and the base sound erupted from within her starting from her stomach into her heart, up the esophagus, and proceeded into her throat where she let out a shout to combat the fear.

And that is how I endured.

That's it my child, let it out. Don't hold back. Don't keep it in. Let it out. Her eyes formed between the clouds and she was watching down to me. The wind was now howling and the leaves were chasing one another in a circular motion. I watched and waited for one to fall out of pattern, but not one leaf disobeyed. We both watched, her and I, waiting for an onslaught of a rebellion. I could feel it forming as the tall grass bent in the wind before me from miles away--a slow tidal wave coming towards me. Circles to my left, waves in front, rumbling from above and the wind billowing from behind my back. It was as if I was a centripetal force, without knowing how to control myself. But, piece by piece, I was filling up, replacing the depleted and stripped away soul that endured many years of emptiness and not knowing how to feel whole again.

I looked up at the cold, iron towers and pumped my fist at them. Up close, they were larger than life--a monstrosity, with jagged edges and never-ending in height, climbing way up high, past the dark clouds into an unknown space that I could only equate to God. The water came in drops and when I looked again into the sky, her eyes were gone.

So I ran. And I ran, however fast my legs could take me. Through the fields into the concrete jungle, where the animals were now in clear sight. Who threatened me with their stares, and shouted nonsensical things to me as I was in flight. They seemed strange to me, baring their teeth, laughing like hyenas, babbling like buffoons--only caring about themselves. Survival instinct. They followed  me until I reached my cave. I was happy to be rid them all although they hovered near my abode, curious but looming. They had never seen my kind and did nothing to learn about me. I was different and that was all that mattered. I looked through a small crack in the cave to see if they had left. They were gone but they would be back the next day and I feared meeting them again. My wounds were too deep. She could only remove the superficial ones but those ones did not matter. I longed to be back with the winds, the sky, the leaves, the grass and the towers--alone. That was the only place I could be penetrated and healed. And she knew that this was the only way.

So everyday I returned to the field. She, in the sky, replenished my soul and she, in the cave, fed me for physical strength.

And that is how I endured.