DTA

DTA

Don't Trust Anyone

Squeeze me?

From a young age, my baby brother always said this to me. DTA.
I used to brush his comment aside and laugh!

But as I grew older, I kept DTA close to me. Maybe because it was my brother's younger wisdom that I admired. Maybe because I knew deep, down inside...that it was true.

Today, someone stole a possession of mine from a very public place. I was working in my director's office to work on multiple tasks. He is great that way--he let's all his team members use the office for this purpose or for brainstorming sessions.

My laptop, purse and phone was on the desk. I left for a one hour meeting and since a fellow co-worker was in the office with me from a previous meeting, he left the door open when he left.

When I came back, my Blackberry had disappeared. Frantically, I looked everywhere and then proceeded to check my purse. Credit cards, check. Money, check. ID, check.

But no BlackBerry. My co-worker remembered seeing my phone in the office when he left. I was stunned--someone was brazen enough to enter the office and take my phone? I called and it went straight to voicemail. I dropped my head, saddened. How can someone just walk in and take MY possessions?

I thought my work world was safe. I was wrong. A wise nod to you, baby bro.

Emotions are the latest fashion

I wear my emotions on my sleeve.

I cannot hide the fact that I am:

-happy
-sad
-depressed
-amused
-angry
-flustered
-aggravated
-puzzled
-moved

Ok, so the list goes on and trust me, may face resembles a cartoon character. Some people are politically correct and very diplomatic by not showing others how they REALLY feel. There are times I admire this quality but then I think to myself, "Aren't you cheating?!?"

Squeeze me?

Are we whipped and trained to control our emotions so much so that we are untrue to ourselves and the people we interact with? Of course, we all know (or do we) that it depends on the situation. Yeah, yeah, I was angry because Sheila's gift to me this year was the exact same gift I gave her last year. Bloody cheapskate! Ok Dad, I will bite my tongue.

Maybe its a woman thing. Women just let other women have it! We don't hold back. Meow! But then again, we manipulate, lie, deceive and just plain hide the truth to sometimes...oh yeah, get what we want ;)

Men say what they mean and mean what they say. And they get into less trouble then women. So is it contingent on gender?

Or maybe its just me? I wash that sleeve every night and those old emotions keep coming right back.

Me Mufassa

Do you find that you only ponder the meaning of life when staring death in the face?

It is not uncommon to hear this and its probably a cliche. The whole episode that when faced with danger, a person's whole life flashes before their eyes.

We have heard it all before. We talk about it, experience it and then we are stopped in our tracks.

I haven't been able to move on for a week now while I ponder the meaning of life. The circle of life...Lion King.

Squeeze me?

I remember the first time I watched the Lion King. Everyone loved it when it first came out. They adored Simba, admired Mufassa and ahborred Scar. Despite everyone's affinity with the characters and storyline, as I watched the movie, I silently and morbidly thought about death. Like Mufassa, Simba would grow up, procreate and die like his father. The circle of life.

My mother died when I was eighteen and herself was very young. My feelings at the time were about the unjustness of it all. But as time wore on, and the shock wore off, I realized she would always be with me. I know she was there as I stood over her grave grieving. I know she was there when I got married and looked over my shoulder at the empty space next to my father. I know she was there in the delivery room when I placed my daughters on my chest. The circle of life.

She tells me in my dreams, "Just move forward"...and I open my eyes to catch my breath.